3.1.09

What is "Auld Lang Syne" anyway?

    Happy New Year!

    To ring in 2009, which I'm sure will be as good as or better than its predecessor, I decided to change the blog around a bit.  I noticed that last month was the only time of the year when "I wish I had a river I could skate away on" really fit as a title.  Plus, it was starting to get annoying, as anytime I'd post, I'd get the song stuck in my head.   But I think I'll keep it on the playlist.  I'm too nostalgic for my own good, I'm sure.

    Wow.  It just hit me.  2008 is gone.  I kind of miss it.

    A lot happened in my life last year. (CAUTION: Long post to follow)  2008 had the last half of my senior year of high school, which marked a lot of change for me as a person.  I got all my college answers--6 acceptances and one wait-list (from University of Richmond?  o.O)--and started doing visits.  I hated those.  
    
    I visted Calvin first, then Hope, both in February.  I remember that because we had to leave to get to Calvin right after school on Valentine's Day and I was a bit upset about that, as it was my first non-single Valentine's Day.  

    Then we went to Lawrence the weekend before spring break, and I wasn't too happy about that timing either, and my host there was terrible.  She was obsessed with Harry Potter, which, by itself, wouldn't be too bad, but she took it too far, and you know when I say that, it's bad.  

    Then we went to visit my aunt in Rhode Island for spring break so that we could get in Boston University, then Boston College, and finally...not Richmond.  We got half-way there when my dad called with the wait-list result, and then went to Gettysburg instead.  That was really fun, actually.  I don't usually like history-buff stuff, but the whole town is really interesting and, dare I say it, cute.

    Then came the one pro/con list to rule them all.  It was very in depth, complete with a point system and several worksheets worth of an Excel spreadsheet.  I remember Lawrence and Iowa State were right out right away because I'm judgmental.  Then slowly, Boston College was ruled out.  Then Hope.  And then I was stuck for weeks between Boston University and Calvin.  I loved Boston when I visited, and when I was done, and I got my acceptance email while in Gettysburg, I was immediately ready to throw away my list and just go.  But, for whatever reason, I didn't want to drop the idea of Calvin.  I couldn't put my finger on it, but whenever I made a decision for Boston, it almost physically hurt to let go of Calvin.  

    I still wonder what I would be like, how different my life would be now if I had chosen Boston over Calvin.  At this point, though, I'm glad I didn't.  I love Calvin, if not for the Christian Reform mayhem, then just because of the people: the professors, the students...I just love it there.  And I really do like learning from a Christian perspective, and being able to discuss my faith openly with almost anyone I come into contact with.  Being able to mention God in my essays on a whim, if I so choose.  Being able to go to church just by walking in the lobby and asking who's going where and if they have extra space in their car.

    I think one of the things that changed my life so much last year was my P.E. class.  You're laughing right now, I'm sure, but I'm serious.  We were called "feelings gym" by the weight-room classes because a big part of the class was us sitting in a circle and discussing our lives.  We went rock climbing too, which was really fun and I can't wait until the climbing wall goes up in our sports center at school, but the biggest thing Outdoor Adventure II taught me was that before I got to know other people seriously, I had to get to know myself.  Luckily, that class also taught me how to do that, which has helped immensely throughout the inevitable changes of last year.

    Another big thing was...well...I feel silly saying it...but a guy.  My short-lived relationship of last year was actually a big turning point in my life.  The more I think about it, the more I'm glad it turned out the way it did, even if it hurt like a certain Unforgivable Curse at the time.  If it hadn't ended as solidly as it did at the seemingly inconvenient time that it did, I could be a completely different person, and I'm not sure I'd like me.  I learned a lot from that guy, as much from his self as from our interactions.  I should find a way to thank him someday.

    I could probably say a lot more, but there are blog posts for the rest of the year, and I have a shower waiting for me in my bathroom right now, so I'm going to leave the rest, perhaps for another time, or perhaps for naught.  I'll let my silence speak as loud as my words.

2008, you were a good friend, and I'm sure I'll never forget you.  (How could I?  I have more than a dozen t-shirts with catchy phrases about Gradu oh eight ing and such...)

Welcome, 2009.  You've got some big shoes to fill.


<3 spadeALLcross

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